How To Grow Money From Trees

This is a magic ritual that has netted me several thousand dollars. Please follow the instructions to the letter, because ritual spell work is very precise. You will need:

• A Green Envelope
• $100 Dollars
• A White Ribbon
• A Plant Pot
• Dirt
• Seeds for any tree.
• Water

On the 3rd night of the waxing moon at midnight, put the hundred dollars into the envelope. Tie the envelope with a white ribbon. Place the envelope at the bottom of the plant pot. Fill the pot with dirt. Place the seeds in the dirt and water.

Now this is the most important part . . . recite:

Tree, Tree, Tree
Bring to me, me, me
Money, Money, Money
From the Trees, Trees, Trees!

You must be completely naked as you recite this poem.
You must recite this poem completely naked at midnight for 30 days.

After the 30th day, dig up the envelope, put some cloth on, and carry your azz to the bank.
Congratulations! You've saved $100!